Mo’ Drugs

I feel VERY strange today. I haven’t actually given that much thought to the feeling, but I suppose it feels like somebody pumped a whole shitload of drugs into me and then spun me around ten times like they do at birthday parties before a pinata  and then asked me a bunch of really brain-hurting questions. 

I changed my own dressing today again. And I’m quite proud of myself actually! Its really hard to do one handed- I can attest to that. I feel strongly about doing the things that are remotely possible to do alone, alone. I apparently all the time say ‘I can do it myself’ which, annoys some people *cough* *mama* *cough*, but you couldn’t understand the crazy need to do some things for myself, until you cannot walk. 
I started on another antibiotic  drug a few days ago called ‘Doxycycline’ or something that sounds an awful lot like that. It is working, no let me rephrase that, its getting where it needs to get because I feel so UBERLY shitty that it only means that I could have pissed off the Lyme bugs, which hurts now alot! Short term loss, long term gain don’t they say? It makes me feel like somebody put a few weights on top of my head (I should add that to my list of metaphors for how I feel today – please see above)
I feel like I’m getting sick, which is quite ironic cause usually all the times I say that nowadays I mean like I’m getting sick-er, from the Lyme. In this case, I actually mean I feel like I’m getting a cold. I forgot what it feels like to get cold-like-sick. It seems laughable that I used to complain about getting a cold. I still hate colds. They are annoying in the way that Lyme hurts.
We went out for Thai food tonight, which is obviously like the BEST kind of food ever. Especially curries! I love curry! It’s like the only thing I can taste. And spicy food is supposed to be good for pain. Thats what they say! 

I was gonna sing the Monday song, and then I found out it was Wednesday…and yah.

Yawn. It’s been ‘one of those days’. I’ve said that so often in early morning band classes to Fyfe that it is practically a mantra. 

I went to the *omg-get-ready-to-gasp* pain doctor yesterday which is like totally original, I know! Versus spending years NOT sleeping, I’m now like in a permanent in between-sleep-and-awake state. I can’t wake up in the morning, like somebody pulled my brain out through my eyes, and then turned me into J-ello. And I am just gushing with adjectives today!! But it doesn’t feel so cut and dry anymore. Being asleep. Being awake. Dreaming. I think that I’ve hit on the other stage of ‘wakefulness’. It’s waking up and still being asleep, like that feeling of being trapped in a night mare and not being able to wake up, ‘cept the opposite. Its like being dropped into a vat of really dense water, and swimming around your day, swimming in your unconscious consciousness.
I got some shampoo samples in the mail today which is like waayy cool! I apparently ordered a whole bunch just ’cause I can’t get them in Canada. And getting the mail has always been like the most exciting this EVER for me. Even in California (when I was little, and mail was delivered to the door versus having mail pods, which is actually more fun!) mail was a seriously cool part of the day, even bills and stuff. I was weird like that. I’m like an advertisers dream too ~ I love all the spam mail and ad’s and that stuff, mostly cause I can use the pictures in a collage! 
Got my dressing changed today, which is so annoying. It doesn’t hurt really but it is super, super uncomfortable. The stir stick sized PICC line and me are tight these days, we’ve really bonded, because, really, in all actuality and fact, it is worth it for having the get the frequent blood draws! They can draw straight from the line (yah! seriously! no needles involved!) which eliminates the whole *shiver* needles thing which makes me totally faint. The PICC line is something I hold very dear to my heart, and it’s actually TRYING to help me, which is nice of it, really, when all I do is get mad at it and all. Seriously, if you ever have to get blood drawn frequently or need to get IV meds or are in a hospital for a long time, try and get a PICC line. No joke, you will regret it like for a week or so, and then you will become great friends. True story! 
Today it was SO WARM that I wore a SHORT sleeve shirt! Wow! It was like 61 F (16 C) out there which is tres, tres exciting! When does spring start? Oh right, Natalie’s birthday, sometime in March. Sigh. Still a long way.